Comparing Mind Sabotages your Singing
“A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it, it just blooms.”
-Zen Shin
“I wish I sounded like her!”
“What am I trying to prove?”
“I look ridiculous compared to everyone here.”
“I’ll never be that good.”
“I could never sing high notes like that.”
Have you ever heard any of these phrases running through your head as you listen to another singer or as you practice? These thought patterns are sometimes referred to as “comparing mind.” For any of you out there who have experienced being caught up in it, you know it can put a real damper on your vocal growth and performance capacity. Sharon Salzberg, the renowned meditation teacher, emphasizes the benefits and pitfalls of comparing mind this way:
“The comparing mind in some ways can be seen as our friend. Our ability to find patterns, to understand why some things are like others, and others are not alike at all, is an important quality of our intelligence. When we use that same gift to essentially compare ourselves to others, however, it often leads to discouragement and defeat. The comparing mind becomes our doubter; it convinces us we’ll never be as good as others, so why go through the agony of trying to change?”
Comparing mind robs us of seeing what is within us. Namely, our one, single, completely unique humanity. Our one, single, completely unique voice.
Nature is our greatest teacher in learning how to recognize the pitfalls of comparing mind and to reconnect to presence. Have you ever looked at a field of flowers and thought, “Ugh, I wish there was less variety!”? Of course not! The beauty of an expansive field of wild flowers is in the range of colours, textures, sizes and fragrances.
Do we judge a flower because it is different from the others around it? Do we discount a flower's colour because it is not red? Do we berate a flower because it needs more or less rain or sun than another does? Do we shun a flower because it is smaller in size than those around it?
Of course, the answer is no.
Yet we do this with our voices all the time.
We judge our voice because it is different than the other singers auditioning for the same role as us. We discount our vocal colour because we decide it is somehow lacking next to that dramatic soprano. We judge our voices because we need more practice or focus time before performing than others do. We shun our voices because they are not as “big” as our colleagues. We berate ourselves because we don’t look a certain way when we sing.
This kind of judgement stifles growth.
It takes us away from finding out what we need to do to nourish our individual voices and our artistry. It takes us away from our true creative expression and our own unique path.
It takes us away from discovering all that is possible within US.
So today I want to offer you these questions:
What if you let go of comparing yourself to other singers?
What if you released the idea that you “should” be more like someone else and instead renewed your focus on developing all that you have to offer through your voice?
Download my Free PDF - 8 Ways to Stop Comparing Mind from Sabotaging Your Singing for strategies to begin to let go of comparing mind so that you can embrace your own unique musical journey.
